Monday, June 8, 2015

I worry too dang much

My brain goes on and on non-stop. Its driving me absolutely nuts.

I wish I knew how to turn it the hell off but its just not working.

Its like I'm looking for an escape. I'm trying to get away but there's no where for me to go.

I should be happy and grateful, yet all I can do is find a quiet place to cry.

I look forward to crying. Whats that about?

Logically, I should be focused on learning my role. Learning new skills. Absorbing everything I can.

But some how my brain has scrambled all that up. Literally, scrambled eggs on a hot sidewalk.

Don't know which way is up.

That should not be so. Young, educated, support system, love, health. What else do I need?

I know Jesus. I talk to him all day.

Somehow the more I talk, the more confusion sets in. How is that possible?

I pray for my sanity cause I feel like it's leaving slowly.

I consider therapy daily. I truly think I need it. Maybe someone needs to diagnose me.

I got my mom and bf preaching to me. Giving me praise and somehow it goes in one ear and out the other.

Maybe I don't need therapy, maybe I need to become a therapist?

What do I want out of life? Do I need to increase my debt to get there? Will that be redundant?

Maybe a diagnosis would be comforting.

Oh brain...






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